We now know, to a greater or lesser extent, that there were illegal Christmas parties taking place across various departments in Whitehall last year. And seemingly these events were either mostly or exclusively for the benefit of Conservative Party staff. That’s not to say revelations won’t appear that involve politically neutral or Labour/Lib Dem staff but — for now — it appears “reckless, selfish, rule breaking” is a symptom suffered most acutely by the Conservatives. Now, we all know by this point why this is so outrageous. The images of the Queen grieving alone. The idea that your Mother or Father should die surrounded by unfamiliar faces in Hazmat suits, in a strange hospital ward, unable to see much less hold their children one last time —all soundtracked by the scoffing laughter of £120k-a-year, Whitehall Tories; it’s enough to make you wonder if they ever encountered taste - long before Covid robbed them of it. From Austerity to Brexit shortages to the Pandemic’s shuttering of almost everything on the High Street — it’s clear as a society we’re trying to make do with less. At times, there’s a depressing acceptance that those of us in the lower socio-economic brackets will probably be left wanting. So I don’t think we ever imagined we’d be looking at a ruling class running so low on class. Unsurprisingly the only thing more infuriating than being taken for a ride, is the feeling you’re being taken for a ride, twice. Fool me once, shame on you. Get me to phone-in my goodbyes to the next batch of dying friends while you knock back Bollinger, doing the conga across SW1... again? Shame on me, clearly.. And that’s what it feels like, now, in December 2021. Reports are emerging (Saturday) that plans are being drawn up to implement a January “Circuit Breaker”. You remember the term "Circuit Breaker", don’t you? It’s from last year. It’s what they called a "lockdown" when it needed a new name, you know, after Barnard Castle. That’s when you know you’re dealing with the "natural party of Government": when they manage to mess things up so badly that even public health messaging in the midst of a pandemic needs a rebrand. Terminology aside, with Omicron running wild, Ministers are indeed strategising the best way to, once again, close businesses and ask people to avoid their friends and family - for the greater good of society. But inconveniently, this is against the backdrop of a partying Roman emperor who we know will not only refuse to stick to the restrictions himself, but who will turn a blind eye to all of his staff when they inevitably break the rules they’re currently writing. Or if he's really bored - attempt to retrospectively re-write the rules for the benefit of whoever broke them. Indeed, much has been made over the past eight weeks of the Tory inclination to wrap restrictions around others while refusing to adhere to them. “Rules for thee but not for me” etc. But we should not forget the broader context that this is a Government that - though elected to serve the public's interests - has at almost every possible juncture sought to pursue a shady or opaque route to either enrich its friends or frustrate the public's trust. Such cavalier attitudes would cause problems for a government in the best of times. But at least outside a scenario that necessitates war rooms and Cobra meetings, the worst we could expect is somebody's Dad to growl: “well, if the Minister for Transport can use the hard shoulder to skip traffic then so can I!” - in a pandemic, where our route out is so dependent on the public STICKING TO THE ****ING RULES, it is a whole other exercise in containment to (when asked to hold back on socialising) hold-in a highly-infectious burst of laughter. Don’t get it twisted, I’m not against locking down. The fact there are still people who question its effectiveness in controlling infections at this stage of the Pandemic is the clearest indicator as to which of your friends were starved of oxygen at birth, since the era of the Crazy Frog ringtone. But for the Conservatives to be considering locking down when they still have such dumpster fire of integrity sat in Number 10, suggests an out-of-touch attitude exists and persists far beyond the entitled, Albino yeti in the hot seat. Put simply, you can’t expect people to accept restrictions when you, yourself, didn’t stick to them. And you can’t expect the public to observe any new restrictions when it’s so obvious the Govt regard their own and their staff's law breaking as something we should turn a blind eye to. After ejecting all their half decent MPs in the 2019 election I wonder if the Conservative Party of 2021 can muster the intelligence to know that there is zero chance of the public adhering to a lockdown - whatever they choose to call it - while Boris Johnson is still in No10.
